


Fashionable Pursuits

by Eoraptor



Category: Kim Possible (Cartoon)
Genre: Community: Kim Possible Slash Haven, Gen, NoShip, Oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-06
Updated: 2016-04-06
Packaged: 2018-05-31 16:47:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6478084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eoraptor/pseuds/Eoraptor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kim Possible travels the world, from Sahara to sub-Arctic. A purple tunic or a belly-bearing turtleneck isn't always climate-appropriate, but can the redhead who once donned magenta goo to fight crime really be trusted to pick out her own clothes? ONESHOT</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fashionable Pursuits

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Rated T for teen and general audiences. Kim Possible and Related Characters © 2002-2007 the Walt Disney Company. I do not own these characters and this work is not for profit and intended only for fair use and enjoyment.

“What the H-E- _double_ -L are you wearing, girl!?” Monique looked askance at her best friend and best client as she entered into ‘Benoi’s Daring Do Outfitters.’

 

“Uh… A coat?”

 

“No… that is not a coat… that is a monstrosity.” The dark skinned girl tisked and tilted her nose up at the black and purple puff jacket the redhead had on.

 

“Yeah, and it’s also warm…” Kim challenged, “If you hadn’t noticed, it’s December in the Colorado high country, and I go places even colder than that on occasion.”

 

By way of demonstration, she opened the coat, showing off the thicker version of her purple tunic beneath the puffy down coat. She then peeled it off and hung it on the back of a chair in Monique’s high end adventuring boutique. “Now do you have my gloves ready or not?”

 

“I do… but now I need to retailor them to go with the new coat you need.” The fashionista scowled at the _thing_ the heroine had hung on her waiting-counter’s seating.

 

Kim huffed and shook her head. “No… for one thing, I have enough accessories to keep track of. For another, I could barely afford the gloves this month. Ever since Shego made me stop buying off the rack, my equipment budget has about tripled.”

 

“And they last you at least twice as long, don’t they?” Monique huffed as she tossed the black leather gloves with the titanium tendons intended to help Kim’s grip strength into a bin, “Good work-wear is not a splurge, it’s an investment.”

 

The dark girl pulled out a tablet and rapidly tapped away at the screen, occasionally looking up at Kim. Finally, she handed it over to the redhead, “Besides. It’s on the house. Anything to get you out of THAT.”

 

“You realize if Shego heard you wanted me out of my clothes she’d gut you, right?” the redhead gave a wicked smirk as she sighed and accepted the tablet, looking at what was being presented to her.

 

“No, she’d thank me. Lest we forget the last time you tried to outfit yourself and wore that purple and black spandex thing. Looked like a dominatrix superhero.” Monique rolled her eyes as she picked up Kim’s coat, and grunted at its unsuspected mass, “What the flip? What, are you running around with rocks in your pockets?”

 

She began to pick out various items from the surprisingly weighty coat, “Grapple #2 and #3, hunting knife, binoculars, pliers, lipstick, lipstick-laser, night-vision sunglasses, silly-string handcuff spray, dare I even ask what else you have stashed in your purse…? Cheesits girl, I know sherpas who pack less gear. Traveling fast and light you ain’t.”

 

The redhead rolled her green eyes and looked at the items presented on her screen. Sighing, she eyed the tablet. Most of the coats on it were leather jackets or ranch style coats, heavy and coarse. Still, she knew her friend. If Monique insisted she was getting a new coat; she was getting a new coat.

 

She wouldn’t put it past the black girl to actually take her down puff jacket before letting her leave, just to MAKE her pick something else. Exhaling, she picked through the selections in Monique’s virtual catalogue. “Oooh, well, maybe this wouldn’t make me look too much like a biker.”

 

Monique took back the tablet and looked at it. “A black trench coat; over black pants and a purple tunic… What is this… 1998?”

 

The pale girl grit her teeth at the resistance, “You have a better suggestion? Because I hate everything else on that list.”

 

The owner of the outfitting shop sighed and considered the selected item. Then she looked over her slim friend with a critical eye. She swiped the image to a new section of the screen and picked a stylus out from behind her ear, “Hmm… Maybe. First, lose the black. You are not the PunishHer. Then… slimmer collar that pops, and shrink the epaulets. The buttons… I’m not a fan. Your gear is all buckles and snaps. Maybe some tent ties? Length…? Mmm, longer would be more dashing with those legs of yours, and change the back from a pleat to a half-split and gusset.”

 

Kim watched Monique work her digital magic. What started as an admittedly cliché black trench coat quickly metamorphosed into something new and different as the costumier worked her magic. Seeing that her friend had slipped into “the zone,” the heroine grabbed her coat, making her way to the door before the fashion terror stole her clothes completely.

 

Seeing her target escaping, Monique called out, “Gimme a week; if you don’t show up, I’m calling your wife!”

 

Kim hissed at the warning as she ducked out.

 

**_ ~KP~ _ **

 

Reluctantly, she returned to Monique’s outfitting shop a week later.

 

“I’ll be right with you Kim; just finishing up with Miss Chase here on saddle care.” the proprietress called out as she finished up with a tall blonde who was trying on some kind of gun holster fashioned in heavy leather.

 

The redhead busied herself with browsing around Monique’s niche shop, considering again the gloves Monique insisted were so hideous with her goose down jacket. She slipped a hand into one and made a fist, feeling it give a satisfying puckering sound as the leather stretched and pulled around the hidden metal wires.

 

“Looks fine together to me,” she muttered petulantly as she considered her fist.

 

“Ugh, piped leather and puffed nylon… you may as well be mixing stripes and dots.” Monique commented, coming up behind her and seizing the coat off of her almost roughly. “This is why your wife lets me pick your clothes. If I left it to you, you’d still be in that harlequin thing you tried last year.”

 

“Hey!” Kim complained righteously as she was stripped of her outerwear, “What was wrong with that!? Shego has worn one for years!”

 

“For one thing, Shego has an abundance of natural curves to compliment the lines,” Monique tisked as she emptied the pockets of Kim’s coat onto the oak counter of her fashion and gear shop, “…while you have the body of a dancer which does not lend itself to superhero spandex. And for another… the pattern work on that thing was atrocious and the designer should be shot for thinking that those angles were anything but mind bending.”

 

“Oh, and Shego’s catsuit lines aren’t?” the redhead irritably countered of the infamous green and black patterned suit.

 

“No, they are controlled chaos… yours were just chaotic.”

 

“Which is why you let her burn them.” The heroine huffed.

 

“Yes. Anyway, on to current matters. And speaking of your lean body…” Monique guided her prized customer towards the side of the store, where an amorphous shape was cloaked by a drop cloth, “I finally came up with some outerwear that compliments your mission gear instead of looking like something you picked up at the goodwill.”

 

Kim again scoffed at Monique’s estimations of her pretty black and purple coat. She crossed her arms irritably over her chest and waited for the unveiling, cocking her hip in a show if dissatisfaction.

 

Rolling her chocolate eyes at the display, the owner of Benois’s Daring Do took her designated place and whipped off the cloth, revealing her latest masterstroke.

 

“I give you _Middleton Fog_. Colorado Grey with Mad Dog Purple accents.” Monique indicated the trench coat hung on the shoulders of the dressing dummy. “This is the woman’s cut, but I am already thinking of a Men’s version. I think Ron would _love it_!”

 

Kim considered the longish coat critically. It was a medium grey, lighter than she supposed she’d expected, based on the black coat she had originally indicated. Sighing, she shrugged, “Alright, give me the catalogue pitch.”

 

“Of course.” The designer grinned, peeling it off the display and moving over to Kim, holding it out for her to don, “The basic design is a classic trench coat, double breasted and double buttoned up front, with a wide collar and cape in back for maximum protection from wind and rain; while still looking presentable enough for most social situations. The belt is double buckled, and double stitched for durability and for visual panache.

 

“However, I’ve altered some of the elements to suit a more active lifestyle like yours, Miss Thang. For one thing, it’s longer than a standard knee-length trench. The back is split open to mid-thigh and inside there are riding loops just like a duster, so it won’t fly up or expose when you’re on horseback, motorcycle, or hover-bike.”

 

Kim looked down at the insides of the long panels and noted the loops, nodding as she slipped her arms into the sleeves, “Well that’s good. Joss swears by her duster anyway. Personally, I like my legs free. Better for kicking.”

 

“Yeah, you say that now… wait till you find out how not getting your pants muddy feels, you’ll never go back. Beyond the legging, I added a couple of internal pockets for you, both map-sized so you can carry larger items like tablets, books, and maps inside away from the weather. All the pockets are double stitched and bar tacked since I know how you are about carrying heavy and pointy things.” The dark skinned girl eyed Kim’s discarded menagerie of gear on the counter with a foul look.

 

“You’ve got two big cargo pockets on the front hips and two slash pockets above the belt, so six pockets total in addition to your hip holster. There’s also an option to put a matching lumbar pouch in back on the belt if you need to tote something big.”

 

Monique then flicked the redhead’s ear, earning a hiss from the heroine, “So no more hoarding crap in one pocket till it blows out, Lil Miss Righty-Tighty-Lefty-Lose-Stuff!”

 

Taking a breath, she then resumed her presentation, “The fasteners are tent buttons, easy to operate with cold fingers or gloves, and they are attached with canvas loops, so you can hang things from them if needed. I put a few more of those loops on the bottoms of the belt loops and inside the jacket as well. Each one should be able to hold up to twenty pounds by itself.”

 

Kim tested the dark purple plastic bars on the front with a tug. They didn’t look as classy as the buttons on the trench coat she had originally picked out, but they probably were more functional for her. Nodding, she bade her outfitter continue.

 

“Same sorts of fasteners on the cuffs and the throat closure for consistency. No metal anywhere in the jacket.” Monique nodded as she popped the collar up, demonstrating how it could be closed around the neck in foul weather. “Seaming is wool woven with polyethylene monofilament; it takes the purple dye better. Shell material is my standard Kim Possible™ blend of Spectra and Kevlar that wears like a rhino skin, but I had the fibers individually waxed before looming to make it waterproof. This compromises the flame retardant abilities a bit, but it will make it extra warm to the weather while still breathing. The skirt can also be fastened closed down to its bottom with the extra ties, but that will compromise your little ninja-kick act. You’ll be comfy down to at least 50 degrees. Colder weather calls for the fleece liner. That snaps in to the collar, waist, and leggings, and will take care of you down to anything you’ll encounter south of the Canadian Shield. Colder than that and you may as well wear straight arctic gear anyway.”

 

“That’s what my wife is for,” the heroine grinned as she listened to the sales pitch and looked at the various features as Monique pointed them out. Indeed, she noticed on closer inspections that while the body of the coat was medium grey, as Monique pointed out the stitching was different; a dark purple contrast.

 

“It’s canvas weight fabric, which means that it should be essentially slash proof, and stab resistant to class two.” The darker woman flicked a finger against the fabric, “But there’s no armor panels, so you’ll still bruise. This is just a coat, not a battle garment.”

 

“Got it.” Kim rolled her eyes at what was a standard disclaimer for her and paid attention. “Anything else?”

 

The designer nodded and tugged the shoulder strap, “Yeah, the epaulets and belt can each hold up your body weight in a pinch. My seamstress pointed out that this means you could use rope on two or three points together to drag a person or a sled. Survival feature. But they are not for climbing; so stick to your rope harness for any rappelling, got it?”

 

The redhead nodded, but thought that that was a pretty good feature. She studied herself in the mirror Monique provided for such things. It was a bit better, she supposed, than the puffy coat. Certainly it had more pockets and features; and that it wouldn’t wear out in a few months was a plus. And the way Monique had puckered the waist to give it form was an improvement over her shapeless eggplant coat too.

 

“So… the aramid fiber fabric, specially treated no less… the custom tailoring… and I’m assuming some pretty major design work…. You... _did_ say this was free, right?” Kim licked her lips as she shrugged her shoulders in the artificial canvas of the coat.

 

Miss Benois smirked and nodded, “Mmmhm. That right there is an almost thirteen hundred dollar garment, girlfriend. But between your name recognition wearing it, and the design I can resell for men and women, I can afford to give one away. Incidentally, you can have your gloves if you want them; they ought to match this just fine.”

 

Kim rolled her eyes and looked at the glove still perched on her right hand, which had started this whole fashion ordeal. “Fine, I’ll take it. Of course, you know what Shego is going to say, right?

 

“Yeah, she’ll want one in green.”

 

“and in black.” The redhead rolled her eyes and laughed.

**Author's Note:**

> AN: Another one of my KPSlashHaven Cookies, based on an article from Smithsonian Magazine on the history of the Trench Coat, and my own ideas on what Kim would need to wear in colder climes. Written about a year ago. Reviews = Love and Sharing = Saintly Charity.


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